Unfortunately as a similar person I would agree. A lot of this is cultural, some of it is just social inertia. We have a good friend, a well educated woman, who in the 1970s married a man who eventually became a state assistant attorney general. He died suddenly and she discovered that every single bank account, credit card, the home own…
Unfortunately as a similar person I would agree. A lot of this is cultural, some of it is just social inertia. We have a good friend, a well educated woman, who in the 1970s married a man who eventually became a state assistant attorney general. He died suddenly and she discovered that every single bank account, credit card, the home ownership, etc. was in his name. My wife is an accountant and it took her and an attorney some time to get everything straightened out so her friend could actually access her money and get credit in her own name. Nobody had thought about this as the man just did it. This is something I recommend couples check over!
The idea that these white men somehow think they have the right to stop women voting is about as foolish as them voting for Trump.
Be that as it may, here we are .
If a woman has been married more than once does she need multiple sets of documents illustrating every name change .
I hope women completely stop taking their husbands names , however the thug men that came up with this would no doubt then exclude women who refused to take their husband names, maybe we should just not marry anymore .
This is BS jump through our hoops requirement. It is not law yet . It’s time for women to refuse to put up with any more sleezy tricks from these loser white male magats. Fight this .
I’m sure there is strategy that we can come up with to make this less appealing to these bigots.
I had my checking account, savings account, several credit cards in my name, our home, and a will that we agreed and signed that I was the Trustee in charge for years before my husband died. But there were three specific accounts, my husband's name only on the accounts, vestiges of his days before we married forty years ago, which weren't worth much; nonetheless, I began after his death to clean up our accounts and discovered how difficult the institutions changing to my name could be, and they almost succeeded. I had a hell of a time with all the games they played - as one company manager said, they are sabotaging you. They would speak in code referencing people I know to emphasis 'so you thought this would be easy'.
One incident that especially stands out is that 4 days before my husband died, I tried to comply with Bank Of America's request to close a small account in my husband's name. I discussed this in an officer's office, and he proved it by calling hdqtrs. It could not be done unless my husband came in and signed. Finally, I came in with my husband, who was, of course, very ill but made a great effort to go in. We were informed I didn't have an appointment, so no, they would not allow him to sign.
This is the COVID-19 period and a time when I was also caring for my mentally disabled son and my husband in palliative care and about to transition to hospice care. We had been banking there for more than forty years. They knew us by name, and other employees stood by, unwilling to challenge the manager. I lost it. Not my finest day. After his death, I was in the bank, and one of the officers said to me
we should have taken care of the issue right then, no matter that I didn't have an appointment. The bank atmosphere is like that of Congress; they are very formal and polite and trained to obey and not make waves in the face of death.
I was informed that the manager had written a letter about me.
I remember as a kid in the 1970’s after my parents divorce, my mom couldn’t even get a credit card in her name without threatening a lawsuit.Our house was in my grandparents name on my mom’s side so there were no issues with that, but when they sold it to move to florida, my mom couldn’t get a mortgage in her name to buy her own place, even though she could afford it, even without alimony considering the fact that my dad hardly ever paid either that or child support. The system was always rigged against women. Especially single or divorced women. The one thing she taught me that stuck with me forever is to NEVER depend on a man to support you. Make your own way in life and make sure that you are financially independent without a man.
Wow, thanks for sharing Carol. I am so sorry that you went through this. Credit unions and neighborhood banks might behave better than big ones. But this was criminally stupid of them. When big institutions act like this the best thing is stop giving them business and let others know why. Telling the upper management can’t hurt either. Sometimes they get the message.
I appreciate your affirming comments. It was three years ago, and I still can't believe anyone would act like that. I immediately withdrew what business we had with Bank of America. My credit union, SDCCU, heard my complaint but didn't comment- at least listened. Yes, Credit Unions are much better at helping when one of their employees does something stupid. Of course, I was cited for my outcry protesting the abuse.
Unfortunately as a similar person I would agree. A lot of this is cultural, some of it is just social inertia. We have a good friend, a well educated woman, who in the 1970s married a man who eventually became a state assistant attorney general. He died suddenly and she discovered that every single bank account, credit card, the home ownership, etc. was in his name. My wife is an accountant and it took her and an attorney some time to get everything straightened out so her friend could actually access her money and get credit in her own name. Nobody had thought about this as the man just did it. This is something I recommend couples check over!
The idea that these white men somehow think they have the right to stop women voting is about as foolish as them voting for Trump.
Be that as it may, here we are .
If a woman has been married more than once does she need multiple sets of documents illustrating every name change .
I hope women completely stop taking their husbands names , however the thug men that came up with this would no doubt then exclude women who refused to take their husband names, maybe we should just not marry anymore .
This is BS jump through our hoops requirement. It is not law yet . It’s time for women to refuse to put up with any more sleezy tricks from these loser white male magats. Fight this .
I’m sure there is strategy that we can come up with to make this less appealing to these bigots.
I had my checking account, savings account, several credit cards in my name, our home, and a will that we agreed and signed that I was the Trustee in charge for years before my husband died. But there were three specific accounts, my husband's name only on the accounts, vestiges of his days before we married forty years ago, which weren't worth much; nonetheless, I began after his death to clean up our accounts and discovered how difficult the institutions changing to my name could be, and they almost succeeded. I had a hell of a time with all the games they played - as one company manager said, they are sabotaging you. They would speak in code referencing people I know to emphasis 'so you thought this would be easy'.
One incident that especially stands out is that 4 days before my husband died, I tried to comply with Bank Of America's request to close a small account in my husband's name. I discussed this in an officer's office, and he proved it by calling hdqtrs. It could not be done unless my husband came in and signed. Finally, I came in with my husband, who was, of course, very ill but made a great effort to go in. We were informed I didn't have an appointment, so no, they would not allow him to sign.
This is the COVID-19 period and a time when I was also caring for my mentally disabled son and my husband in palliative care and about to transition to hospice care. We had been banking there for more than forty years. They knew us by name, and other employees stood by, unwilling to challenge the manager. I lost it. Not my finest day. After his death, I was in the bank, and one of the officers said to me
we should have taken care of the issue right then, no matter that I didn't have an appointment. The bank atmosphere is like that of Congress; they are very formal and polite and trained to obey and not make waves in the face of death.
I was informed that the manager had written a letter about me.
I remember as a kid in the 1970’s after my parents divorce, my mom couldn’t even get a credit card in her name without threatening a lawsuit.Our house was in my grandparents name on my mom’s side so there were no issues with that, but when they sold it to move to florida, my mom couldn’t get a mortgage in her name to buy her own place, even though she could afford it, even without alimony considering the fact that my dad hardly ever paid either that or child support. The system was always rigged against women. Especially single or divorced women. The one thing she taught me that stuck with me forever is to NEVER depend on a man to support you. Make your own way in life and make sure that you are financially independent without a man.
Wow, thanks for sharing Carol. I am so sorry that you went through this. Credit unions and neighborhood banks might behave better than big ones. But this was criminally stupid of them. When big institutions act like this the best thing is stop giving them business and let others know why. Telling the upper management can’t hurt either. Sometimes they get the message.
I appreciate your affirming comments. It was three years ago, and I still can't believe anyone would act like that. I immediately withdrew what business we had with Bank of America. My credit union, SDCCU, heard my complaint but didn't comment- at least listened. Yes, Credit Unions are much better at helping when one of their employees does something stupid. Of course, I was cited for my outcry protesting the abuse.